7 questions with Dan Pelosi a.k.a. GrossyPelosi!

plus his recipe for Tuscan Panzanella Salad for paid subscribers!!

Hi friends! I’m so delighted to welcome Dan Pelosi (a.k.a. GrossyPelosi) into the KC&CO community today. While we’ve only met in person once before, I’ve always felt a real kinship with Dan, which you’ll see in the small interview that follows. I’m very happy for him as this week his latest book, Let’s Party, came out on Tuesday! And how lucky are we that today Dan is here answering seven questions for us and offering a recipe for Tuscan Panzanella for paid subscribers??

Hi Dan! (photo by Johnny Miller)

ABOUT DAN

Dan Pelosi is the Italian American meatball-making-meatballs behind GrossyPelosi, the popular Instagram favorite for all things food, comfort, and lifestyle. Approachable and tasty, Dan’s dishes are meant to be shared with the ones you love. Dan is the author of the New York Times bestselling cookbook Let’s Eat (2023) and regularly contributes recipes to New York Times Cooking. He splits his time between Brooklyn and Upstate New York, and you can always find him online at danpelosi.com or @grossypelosi on social media.

AND HERE’S HIS NEW BOOK!

1. At the beginning of the introduction to Let’s Party, you share what's probably one of my favorite sentences I've ever read in a cookbook: "Hi, I’m Dan Pelosi, and my favorite kind of party is one where I can sit down." So now that we have the vibe established, what inspired you to write this book?

Okay I am so glad that that line resonated with you, it’s perhaps the most important line in the intro. I really felt like I needed to establish what my kind of party was from the start, so people knew what they were getting into: a book on how to throw dinner parties with loved ones around the table eating, without loud music or juggling a tiny plate and glass while standing.

My inspiration for writing this book came from 2 things: 1. A lifetime of hosting parties, whether it was helping my family members entertain as a kid at our family gatherings or hosting my own as soon as I had my own space to do as much. I am somehow always at the center of gathering people I love. 2. Getting asked “how do you do it?” by my friends and my amazing followers after hosting or entertaining. While it all feels second nature to me, that is not the case for most people, and I want to share the simple and easy ways I think about entertaining and hosting - whether it’s a small weeknight dinner for a few people or a weekend dinner party for a crowd.

2. What was the most challenging part of writing Let's Party? And the most rewarding?

I would say the most challenging part was creating the menus. The book is divided into 16 menus under different themes, with about 6ish recipes that are meant to be cooked together (or on their own, of course!) to create a thoughtful, delicious meal for about 8 people. I had lots of ideas of what recipes would sit nicely next to each other, but the challenging part was making sure they were cookable together. That meant lots of make ahead components, unfussy steps, and items that could hit the table hot, cold and somewhere in between. Each menu has a 3-day make-ahead timeline that walks you through how to do it all - which I am very proud of. I cannot wait to hear from people who use the timeline to successfully host these menus, that will be the ultimate reward.

3. How do you want people to feel when they're in the pages of Let's Party?

I had a really specific vision for the design and art direction for the book - beyond the food. I wanted each menu to be shot as part of the same table, the same party, so you really felt the intentionality of the menu, and the vibe. I wanted people to feel inspired to throw these parties in their own homes. To make the whole menu and to be already starting to plan the tablecloths and napkins they will use, who will be there and what it will feel like. This is the kind of excitement that is at the heart of the way I entertain.

I wanted to design parties that could be a bit agnostic. Some of the parties have obvious nods to holidays, but I wanted you to feel like you can make any night special with these menus. Girls’ Nigh In is a nod to Valentine’s Day, and want to spend it with your best friends rather than a romantic partner. But this menu could be any night, you wanna just be cozy with your besties.

4. For your readers who are more guests than hosts, what do you recommend they bring when they're invited to a meal? A.k.a. what are some of your favorite things folks have brought you when you have them over??

I am famously the host who says “don’t bring anything, just yourself”. And by that I mean, prepare yourself to help out when you are here - whether it’s answering the door while I am cooking, asking where the trash goes when the bin is full, or doing the dishes. That is the best gift to any host, I think. In Let’s Party, I have a guide to cleaning before, after and during a party, if some of you need help on how to be that guest!

Now, I know I didn’t exactly answer your question, so here’s what I say to those who want to bring a gift to their host: don’t bring anything that requires the host to do work during the party. If you want to bring a drink, tell the host it’s for them to enjoy after the party, which will relieve the pressure of them making sure it gets served at the party. My favorite gifts, though, are when people bring me something you love having or using in your home - like a candle or some cloth napkins - that way I am getting to know YOU rather than what you think I’d like.

5. We've spoken briefly about this before, but we both have shared publicly about having complicated relationships with eating and our bodies and how we navigate that as people who write cookbooks and do "food stuff" for a living. What has it meant to you to be open about that?

It’s been liberating…and also continues to be challenging and helps me grow! But mostly, liberating! To get to celebrate food with others without any of the hesitation, shame or judgement that I feel like I inherited from our culture growing up when I did. I get to be the kind of food media I desperately needed to see as a kid - a proud, bigger bodied gay man who unabashedly celebrates and enjoys food and still has a full life with a loving partner and family.

Food is a really sensitive topic for people, so of course, their own discomfort with the topic can manifest as lashing out at me about stuff. My drive to keep sharing about it and being open is the hundreds of messages I get from people telling me how much they relate and are also learning to love and accept their body and foods they love. It’s been really beautiful to help people find joy (and only joy) in food, and to also teach them to enforce boundaries around the way people talk to them about their food and bodies in their own lives.

6. Another personal question! The first thing that hit me when I looked at your book for the first time was your dedication to Gus. As a fellow queer cookbook author, what does it mean to you to share so openly and lovingly about your relationship?

It’s similar to the conversation around bodies and food. When I started loving everything that made me…me, everything sort of opened up. Gus and I are both very in love with each other, AND we are both autonomous individuals with our own sense of selves. The greatest act of love we can show each other is being the secure champion of each other’s fullest expression of self. We love each others’ friends and families and interests and hobbies and want to be part of each others’ lives. We do not feel the need to fit into any idea of what a queer (or straight) relationship should look like, but I do feel very lucky to, again, model what it could look like.. I get so many messages from followers who comment on the way we look at each other, or the way I giggle in the background of the hysterical videos he shares on his instagram. It’s really sweet that they can see what we feel. And it’s even sweeter when queer followers tell me that they see a future for themselves in what Gus and I have right now. We are so lucky.

7. And the question I ask everyone: what was your favorite thing to eat when you were growing up? first thing to come to mind!

As a self-proclaimed Meatball-making-Meatballs, the answer is and will always be, meatballs!

A GIFT FROM DAN FOR PAID SUBSCRIBERS!

How delicious does this look?? Don’t you want this right now?? Photo by Johnny Miller.

Dan has generously offered his recipe for Tuscan Panzanella Salad for paid subscribers!

Recipe reprinted with permission from Let’s Party by Dan Pelosi © 2025. Published by Union Square & Co., an imprint of Grand Central Publishing, a division of Hachette Book Group. Photography by Johnny Miller.

Tuscan Panzanella Salad

Serves 6 to 8

I’ve always said panzanella salad is just a bread basket in drag. It’s the same satisfying taste of ripping apart a dinner roll and running it through vinegary oil but dressed up for the evening gown portion of the night. This salad began as Tuscan peasant food, a very smart way to get an extra meal out of stale loaves. Now you’ll find it with luxury accessories like cheese, stone fruits, or all kinds of proteins. She is the original Mother of the House of Panzanzella, and her authenticity speaks for itself. When the tomatoes mingle with onions, red wine vinegar, oil, and plenty of salt and pepper, you’ve got everything you need in the world. Waiting until the very last minute to toss in the toasted bread means you’ll get that balance of crunchy and soft, saturated bites that make this salad so perfect.